McBirdie`s Nest

After no small amount of delay, I bring you the newest Love Project post.  I think it is fitting that this one took longer to get up, because it is one of the less superficially pleasant ones.  Unlike the sheer joy of realizing that you're falling in love or the calm hopefulness of realizing that you're finally moving on from a heartbreak, the moment of breakup seems to have no redeeming value to it.  It is at this point that we are at our most vulnerable and childlike--but it is also at this point where we are most similar, I think.  No matter how terribly your heart seems to be breaking, someone out there has felt the exact same thing.  They, too, have wondered what to do with themselves now that there is a gaping hole where their lover used to reside and feared they would never stop feeling that pain.

Rather than being an upsetting post, though, I think that posts written at the moment of heartbreak are the most comforting.  It is a gift to be able to look back and remember how badly you felt and realize--it passed.  It always does.  For everyone, no matter what time is involved in finally getting to the other side, we all do. 

If you need to catch up, links are at the bottom of the post.  Read on to get the Moment of Breakup:

There will be a new Love Project proper post going up soon, just as soon as I can remember where I "safely" filed the thing--it's an interesting one, I think, as it is a snapshot of the moment right after a breakup.  As a bonus, there will be a follow-up post of an outsider's perspective on said breakup.  The familiarity that we can all find in other people's relationships and breakups is the whole point, so do send in your own stuff and your commentary on others.  If you want to catch up before then, head over here.

In the meantime, though, I was thinking about what it is to start new relationships once you've got a certain amount of age and experience under your belt.  Theoretically at least, you have started to refine what it is you're looking for--a girl of 18, for example, may say she wants an intelligent man, but a woman of 30 is able to clarify if she means she wants someone she can have long rambling discussions on politics with or if she means she wants someone who isn't going to embarrass her at dinner parties when the discussion turns to a subject other than Big Brother--but you should also have started to refine your own lines of compromise and concept of Need To Haves.

Continuing on from the zygote of the Love Project, I present to you the next letter.  This one is taken from  that post-breakup phase when you're shedding the anger and hurt and trying to find the positives from the relationship.  Not as much fun as the Getting-Drunk-And-Slagging-Them-Off Phase, but it has its charms.

Same warning as last time:

Emotional letter follows the jump--do not read on if you are embarrassed / uncomfortable / afraid it might be about you.

 And again, if you would like to submit your own, just get in touch.  All names will be hidden to protect the innocent, guilty, and embarrassed.